wat bout pragnant strippers??
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
