I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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