somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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