ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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