well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
