Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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