yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
