Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Randomize