so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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