it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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