Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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