Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
