The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
