Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...