well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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