no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
