Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
