I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
