You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
