I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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