come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
