I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize