Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?

(1-404): View more from Georgia

did you answer or finish?

(404): View more from Georgia

both

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(970): View more from Colorado

Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.

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(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it

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21 Sketchy Drug Deals That Are Scary AF
Read it at the TFLN blog
(818): View more from California

Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO

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(712): View more from Iowa

Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.

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(630): View more from Illinois

He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.

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