Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM