we have pet lesbian snakes
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
