I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
