Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
