Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
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to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
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My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Boobs speak an international language.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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