I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
