i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I love having hate sex.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize
