I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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