I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize