Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
