so explain again why im purple
no
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
