I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
