When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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