The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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