I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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