Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize