Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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