You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize