Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
high people should be assigned attendants
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
