Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.