I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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