I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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