Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
