i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
