I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.