Those balls look pretty dangerous.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
