I'm jealous of your bromance
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
