The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
