And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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